


i'm not that nice

by bawling



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-06
Updated: 2018-10-06
Packaged: 2019-07-20 08:19:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16133351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bawling/pseuds/bawling
Summary: A year after their childhood friend is killed in a car accident at Junior Prom, Eddie, Richie and company navigate their last two weeks of high school, fall in love, and smoke a lot of weed.





	i'm not that nice

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ghostlesbian](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostlesbian/gifts).



> i have never heard of netflix's dude 2018 in my life
> 
> come yell at me [@butcheleven](http://butcheleven.tumblr.com)

“Trade me the eye drops for the mints.”

Richie’s head was tipped back, dark curls splayed haphazardly against the headrest as he blinked back the Visine in his eyes. Eddie elbowed him in the shoulder until he held out the dropper on an open palm, and replaced it with their nearly empty pack of Listerine strips.

“These things are fucking nasty.” Eddie could hear Richie pop open the strips as he counted the drops in each eye. “I love them.”

“Better than having weed breath at school.”

“As if your little cardigans haven’t been soaking up all the skunk in my car every morning.”

Eddie shot him a look, but Richie’s eyes were closed. His head was still tilted back against the driver’s seat, thick eyelashes fluttering on his freckled cheeks. Eddie watched the stretched cords of his neck flex and licked his lips.

“If you two are finished flirting, can I get those eye drops.” 

Eddie rolled his eyes and turned towards the backseat. Bev was in the middle of her last drag off the one-hitter they kept stashed in Richie’s car for before-school emergencies. This wasn’t strictly an emergency, but with only two weeks left of senior year, being sober was not high on anyone’s priority list.

Eddie launched the bottle of Visine at her forehead and it bounced off onto the seat next to her. She held out the one-hitter and Eddie turned to stick it back in the glovebox. He gave an exasperated sigh and let his forehead fall against the dashboard.

“Fuck. I have so much stuff to do before prom.” He tilted his head to the side so he could see Richie. “Have you started writing your graduation speech?” 

“Fuck no.” He opened his eyes and looked down at Eddie. “You look completely blasted.”

“Who would’ve guessed. Our little Eddie, student body president _and_ a stoner.” Eddie sat up and watched Bev lazily drop the solution into her blue eyes in the rearview mirror. “All that inhaler bullshit turned out to be excellent bong-hitting training.”

“Yeah, and the dry swallowing made him great at sucking dick.” 

Richie nonchalantly adjusted his glasses in the fold-down mirror.

“So you _are_ jealous of my dick-sucking technique.”

“Maybe I would be if you gave me a sample, baby.”

He wiggled his eyebrows at Eddie as he closed up the mirror. Eddie flipped him off.

“I can’t stand you guys.”

They gathered up their backpacks and Richie’s guitar case and filed out of the trusty Oldsmobile. Bev spotted Ben waiting for her near the south entrance. He waved.

“See you at lunch!”

“Not me.” Richie mumbled around the cigarette he was lighting. “I have that thing, remember? The advisor meeting?” 

“Oh, right. Break a leg, champ.”

Richie saluted her as she ran across the parking lot and launched herself into Ben’s arms. Eddie watched as they walked through the doors, hand in hand.

“Do you think they'll get married?”

Richie exhaled a plume of smoke and shrugged.

“I dunno. Bev’s not really that type of girl.”

“And Ben’ll just do whatever Bev wants.”

“Exactly.” 

*

Eddie was already waiting when Richie snuck out of his sixth period Biology class precisely seven minutes before the final bell. 

“So?” 

Richie hefted his tattered Jansport over one shoulder and his guitar case over the other. He looked down at Eddie, brows wrinkled behind the thick frames of his glasses.

“So what?”

“How’d your meeting go?”

“Oh, that.” Eddie tugged on the hem of Richie’s t-shirt, leading him backwards down the hall. “She said waitlisted students are finding out if they got in this week. Apparently, I’m supposed to _surround myself with positivity_.”

Richie gave very dramatic air quotes to the last part. Eddie snorted.

“You totally need to open your third eye.”

“I’ve already got four! Count ‘em.” 

Richie flicked the left lens of his glasses. Eddie rolled his eyes fondly.

“I still don’t get how the valedictorian gets waitlisted anywhere.”

“It’s all about politics, shortcake. Anyways, if I don’t get in, there’s always UCLA or USC.”

“LA?” Eddie frowned. “You never told me you applied there.”

“Eds, seriously. How many times do we have to go through this.” 

“Whatever, it doesn’t matter. You’re going to NYU and I’m going to Columbia. The universe is _not_ fucking this up, I forbid it.” 

Richie let out a bark of laughter as he reached to open the door to the front courtyard. He held it open for Eddie and smiled softly. 

“Life partners forever, huh?” 

Eddie couldn’t help but smile as Richie followed him outside. He turned to face him. There was a stray eyelash caught under the rim of his glasses. Eddie leaned in and gently brushed it away with his thumb. 

“Something like that.”

The corner of Richie’s lips quirked up. He opened and closed his mouth like he was trying to say something, but the sound of someone calling Eddie’s name made both of them crane their necks towards the southern entrance.

“Hey, Kaspbrak!”

Eddie waved when he recognized the girls he’d recruited from the varsity soccer team. Holly, tall and blonde, was holding a plump stack of five by five, neon pink flyers.

“Is that them?” Eddie excitedly plucked one out from the back of the pile and skimmed. “Everything looks good. Nice work, guys.”

“Are you sure this is enough? Maybe we should make a Facebook event.”

“Word of mouth works better than notifications.” Eddie held out his hands and accepted the stack of papers from her manicured nails. “We’ll see you guys tomorrow tonight.” 

They eyed Richie predatorily as they sauntered off in the direction of the soccer field. Eddie rolled his eyes and made his way to the middle of the courtyard. Richie trailed behind him.

“Why exactly will we be seeing them tomorrow night?”

“Because of my _brilliant_ marketing strategy, Richard. Watch and learn.”

Just as the bell rang, Eddie climbed up onto one of the stone benches that littered the courtyard. There was a small plaque on the backrest that read: _In Loving Memory of William Denbrough_.

Students streamed out of the building through both entrances. Eddie cleared his throat and yelled over their shuffling feet. 

“Pre-prom rager tomorrow night, unofficially sponsored by varsity soccer and student council. Ten dollars at the door covers your prom ticket. That’s five dollars off regular tickets, people! Alright, I’m about to do something against the rules. Don’t make me regret it.”

With a flick of his wrist, Eddie launched the stack of flyers into the air. He watched the soft spring breeze spread them across the mass of eager students.

Nothing in the last twelve months had made much sense.

It didn’t make sense that their best friend was killed in a car wreck on his way home from Junior Prom. It didn’t make sense that the boy he’d loved since he was eleven years old was gone. And it _especially_ didn’t make sense that everything simply continued on, like he’d never been there at all.

Eddie caught Richie’s eye through the flurry of pink paper and his chest fluttered at the huge grin plastered across Richie's face.

He smiled back, and for the first time since that night, it felt like life was starting to clear up.

*

Eddie blew on the column of steam that was billowing off the top of his cup of herbal tea. He was sitting up in bed, tucked neatly under his freshly laundered sheets and comforter, laptop sitting on his knees. 

“Mike, did you ever decide if you’re coming to prom?”

“I don’t know, I was sort of hoping that Sarah—you know, that girl I work with at the library? That she would ask me. I think she wants to. Do you think I should just ask her?” 

His screen was split into four squares: Richie in the top right, Mike in the bottom left, Stan in the bottom right, and Ben and Bev in the top left. Evening Skype sessions had become a frequent replacement for hanging out, as the mounting to-do lists of college and finals consumed their collective eighteen-year-old minds.

“Definitely.” Bev answered him with enthusiasm. “Just tell us when you’re gonna ask her, we can buy the tickets for you guys.” 

Eddie looked up from his tea and cleared his throat.

“Guys?” Their heads looked up from where most of them were focused on homework or applications or looking at memes on Instagram. “I was sort of thinking we could all go to prom together.”

There was a very pregnant pause before Stan answered.

“What about those of us with, you know. Significant others.”

“Yeah, no, I get that. And Patty and Sarah are totally welcome to join, I mean, Bev and Ben will be together too. It’s just,” Eddie let his eyes fall to his tea. “This is one of the last big things we all get to do together.”

Bev’s voice was soft in reply.

“Eddie, it’s not like we’re never going to hang out after high school ends.”

“I know that. But,” He swallowed the lump that was trying to swell up in his throat. “ _He_ won’t be there. And when we all leave Derry, it’s like we’re leaving him, too.”

Everyone was very quiet. Richie disappeared out of the frame as he fell back onto his bed with a thud. Eddie was about to apologize for apparently having suggested such a terrible idea when Ben spoke up.

“I think that’s a great idea, Eddie. Guys?” 

There was a wave of affirmative murmuring and head nodding. Richie stuck a thumbs up directly into his webcam. The sound of papers being stacked up came from Stan’s microphone.

“I’m gonna go, Patty’s coming over in a few minutes to study. See you guys tomorrow.”

One by one, they all said goodnight, until Richie’s video feed was the only one taking up space on Eddie’s screen.

“Looks like it’s just me and you, space cowboy.”

His curly head, eyebrows, and the tops of his glasses peeked into the frame, like he was propped up on his elbows. 

“That’s because everyone else has a life.” 

“Speak for yourself, spaghetti man.” He sat up properly and his worn out old t-shirt slipped down over his collarbone. “There’s a bowl of leftover mac and cheese in the fridge calling my name.” 

“You’re right. You are the most interesting person I know.”

“You know,” Richie ignored Eddie’s teasing deadpan and ran a hand through his unruly curls. “I _could_ be persuaded to share. If I had company.”

“Can’t tonight. I’m already planning to break curfew tomorrow. My mom would literally murder me if she caught me two nights in a row.”

“Roger that.” Richie yawned into the camera. He pushed his glasses up onto his head and rubbed his eyes. “Think I’m gonna hit the fucking hay. Night, ball and chain.”

Richie ended the call before Eddie had the chance to respond. 

“Night, Rich.”

* 

“So, like I said, we’ll get printed schedules with the times for each of the varsity games and details for the post-game bonfire circulated tomorrow. Any questions?” 

Eddie took the bored silence as a no. 

Student council met in the English Lit homeroom on Tuesdays and Thursdays after school. It was a sparse but passionate group, mostly made up of sophomores and juniors that Eddie had gently bullied into signing up so all his effort wouldn’t be completely abandoned after graduation.

The outlier was Richie, who’d been bullied into joining for no other reason than Eddie enjoyed making him do things. 

“Alright, prom. There are just a few details I wanted t—”

Eddie heard a conspicuous cough coming from a few feet to his right. He turned and saw Mr. Dean, their faculty supervisor, making meaningful eye contact with someone in the room.

“Mr. Tozier, if you’d like to address the agenda issue you had regarding prom?” 

“Thank you, Mr. Dean, I sure would.” Eddie’s stomach dropped into the floor. He whirled around on his heels in time to see Richie unzipping his guitar case. “I’m sure we’d all love to listen to Comrade Kaspbrak list off some sexy finger foods or whatever the fuck—”

Mr. Dean coughed again.

“Sorry. I thought we might spice things up and talk about the one prom activity that’s on everybody’s mind—getting laid.”

Eddie could see Mr. Dean rubbing his temples in his peripheral vision. Richie carried his guitar in one hand and dragged his desk chair to the front of the room with the other, until it was pressing against the side of Eddie’s leg. He slipped his guitar strap over his head and pointed at the chair.

“Park it.” 

 _Jesus H Christ_. Eddie sunk slowly into the chair, legs bent as if he was about to run sprints. Richie strummed an opening chord and began to sing: 

 _Eddie will you please go to prom with me_  
_I think you are really hot and really neat_  
_I have wanted to ask you for like 600 weeks_  
_Sorry if that makes me a creep_  
_I’m so tall and I’m bi_  
_And you're gay_  
_We're both varying degrees of gay_  
_And gays should stick together because there's not that many of us_  
_So let me go to prom with you  
__Don't say no don't say no don't say nooooo_  

Before Richie was done hammering on the last chord, Eddie was on his feet.

“That was great. Isn’t he great, guys? Hilarious, terrific prank, Rich. Alright, I’ll send an email tonight with the stuff we didn’t get to. Meeting adjourned.”

The room filled with the sound of students packing up and Eddie made a beeline to where he’d left his backpack near the front row. Richie was right behind him. 

“Listen, I know you wanted us to all go together, but I was already planning on asking you. It’s not like we won’t be there as a group, we’ll just be, you know. More together with each other than with anyone else.”

Eddie hoisted his backpack over his shoulder and turned to face Richie, still holding the neck of his guitar.

“ _Prom_ is my prom date.” He started to walk away, but stopped and looked back. “The last thing I need right now is you fucking with me.”

He turned on his heels and slipped out the door.

*

Eddie spent the rest of the day ignoring his phone. 

He’d been down this road with Richie before, enough times to know that ignoring him wouldn’t make whatever idiotic thing he did go away. His brain kept playing the whole thing on a loop, which forced him to accept that he may have overreacted. Just a little.

When 8:00 finally rolled around, he was lying on his bed, making a mental pros and cons list of skipping the party. When it came down to it, he’d been the one to organize it, sort of. And they hadn’t sold nearly enough prom tickets, which was the entire point of going.

He wasn’t about to let Richie and his own neuroticism ruin the most important night of his presidency. 

He walked up the front steps and was relieved to see a line of people waiting to get inside. He managed to squeeze past with a quick hello to his fellow council members at the ticket table. He scanned the crowd for signs of Richie. Nothing. In the far corner, he spotted Bev, Ben, Stan, Patty and Mike standing near a window. 

Bev caught his eye and enthusiastically waved him over.

“Hey! Where have you been? We called you like, a million times.”

“Oh, yeah, my phone’s off. I just got here.”

“In that case,” She grabbed him by the wrist and started dragging him towards the hall. “You have some catching up to do.”

She pulled him through the sea of sweaty bodies until they were standing outside the kitchen. She stood aside and gestured him inside like a fancy butler.

“After you, Mister President.” 

Eddie made for the huge haul of liquor and soda on the counter.

“Where’s Richie?”

“Oh, I dunno. Around.” Eddie frowned at the forced nonchalance in Bev’s voice. Before he had a chance to mention it, she gasped and pointed over his head. “What the _fuck_ is that?”

Eddie whipped his head around. Richie’s face was plastered against the sliding glass door that lead from the kitchen into the backyard. Eddie rolled his eyes and turned back to yell at Bev, but she was already long gone.

“Fuck me.”

Back at the sliding glass door, Richie had produced a joint and was wiggling it meaningfully in Eddie’s direction. He walked backwards and out of sight. Eddie sighed and followed him outside.

“Really clever plan the two of you cooked up. Very original.”

Eddie could hear the click of Richie’s lighter as he closed the door behind him.

“Call us old school, but it did the trick.”

Eddie couldn’t really argue with that. He walked across the patio to where Richie was sitting precariously on the edge of a flower bed. He looked up at Eddie and held out the lit joint. Eddie took it and scooted in close to sit next to him.

“So, were you just waiting for me out here with a joint this whole time?” 

“Maybe.” Richie cocked an eyebrow at him. Eddie took a long drag and wrinkled his nose as he resisted the urge to cough. Richie looked down at his dirty Vans. “It’s an apology joint. Sorry for embarrassing you earlier, I was trying to be _smooth_.” 

“No, Rich, stop. I’m the one who should apologize. You were just being you and—I don’t know, I was being a bitch.”

Richie plucked the joint out of Eddie’s hand and took another drag.

“What d’you mean? You think I was kidding?”

“Seriously, Rich, you don’t have to do this.” 

“Do what?”

“You know what I mean!” Eddie smacked Richie’s arm. “Jesus, I know you were just like, clowning around like you always do. It was funny and cute and I know I shouldn’t have taken it so seriously, I’m just being more neurotic than usual because—”

Eddie was unceremoniously interrupted by Richie’s chapped lips making contact with his dutifully moisturized ones.

He made a surprised sound into Richie’s mouth that turned into a gasp when Richie’s teeth tugged on his bottom lip. Richie’s warm palm rested on his jaw, and his own hands wandered up and gripped Richie’s bony shoulders, slid up the back of his neck until he was grabbing the curls at the back of Richie’s head.

“Hopefully this clears things up.”

Richie leaned back just long enough to whisper into Eddie’s mouth before he was moving back in. He tilted Eddie’s head back and moved down to suck on the delicate skin of his neck. Eddie heard himself make an embarrassingly loud sound and was knocked back into sanity.

“ _Whoa_ there Nelly, hold your fucking horses.” He jumped up from his seat and stared down at Richie in shock. Richie didn’t look the least bit surprised. In fact, the bastard looked pretty damn smug. “What the hell?”

“What?”

“Don’t you fucking _what_ me, asshole! What is this?”

“Pretty sure it’s what the kids call hooking up, Eds. Next, I take you into the bathroom and suck your dick.”

“Oh my god. Stop.” Eddie covered his face with his hands and took a deep breath. “This cannot be happening.”

He heard Richie stand up. His huge hands wrapped gently around Eddie’s wrists and pulled his hands away from his face.

“Hey, if I’m out of line, you can tell me to fuck off. No harm done.”

“It’s not that.”

“No?”

“No, just like, _here_? Really?” Richie’s eyebrows raised in amusement, which just made Eddie madder and, inconsequentially, more turned on. “You’re wasted and I’m at peak stress, we’re at some random person’s house, killing their mom’s begonias with our asscheeks, and you do this _now_?”

Richie didn’t say anything. He just blinked slowly down at Eddie, still holding his wrists, waiting for him to cool down. Eddie sighed and wriggled his hands out of Richie’s grasp.

“Alright, here’s what’s going to happen. I’m going back in there to do what I _came_ here to do, which is sell prom tickets. _You_ are going to give me your keys, walk home, and sleep it off. Tomorrow afternoon, you’re going to text me and ask to come pick up your car. Got it?” 

Eddie held out his palm. Richie shook his head absently as he dug his keyring out of his back pocket and dropped it into Eddie’s waiting hand. 

“You’re sexy when you’re mad.”

“Shut up.” 

Eddie stalked back inside without another word. He poured himself a cup of plain orange juice, gave himself a very brief pep talk, and made his way back to Bev’s red hair that stuck out in the thick crowd.

He squeezed into the circle next to Ben, who looked down at him with a grin, and then a suspicious frown.

“What happened to your lip?”

“What?” Eddie reached up and touched his bottom lip. It stung, and there was blood on his finger when he pulled back. _That fucking dickhead_. “Oh. I, uh...”

He instinctively made nervous eye contact with Bev. She was an expert wingman and didn’t falter for a second.

“Hey Patty, have you ever accidentally had two tampons inside you at the same time?” 

Patty looked mildly horrified, and an impassioned debate broke out about the taboo nature of talking about menstruation of which Stan was, in that moment, strongly against.

Eddie sighed in relief and turned to look out the window. The moon was a sliver in the cloudy sky, and the street lamps made the asphalt glow orange. He saw a tall and skinny someone walking across the street, away from the party, hands shoved in his back pockets.

Eddie bit his bloody lip against a smile.

*

The next day at school was shockingly normal.

Richie was just as annoying as always, bugging him during their classes together and stealing his spork during lunch. It might’ve been his overactive imagination, but Eddie could practically  _feel_ Richie’s eyes on him, would’ve sworn that Richie’s hand lingered a little longer than usual when he touched the small of his back in the lunch line.

Richie’s car was out of commission, parked on the curb outside Eddie’s own house, so he met up with Bev in the courtyard after the last bell.

Bev and Eddie lived the closest of all their friends. Her aunt had purchased a house just a few blocks away when they’d moved back to Derry at the start of high school. The spring green lawns and blooming flowers in the front yards rustled softly as they walked.

“So, did you know?”

“Know what?” Bev’s voice was a little too noncommittal. Eddie gave her a look and she sighed. “No, he didn’t tell me his plans in exact detail, if that’s what you’re asking. But I probably could’ve guessed.”

Eddie groaned.

“I don’t understand him. It’s like, this is coming so out of left field, you know?”

“Are you really that surprised?” Bev sounded genuinely surprised. Eddie frowned at her. “I mean, you two have always been close.” 

“Yeah, but as _friends_. Best friends. We’re all close, we’ve all always been that way, but it was never like—” 

Eddie caught himself, but Bev was giving him a troubled sideways glance.

“Like Bill?”

Eddie sighed. Bev reached out and laced her fingers in his. 

“It’s okay to not be over it.” Eddie wasn’t really sure if that was true. She squeezed his hand like she was reading his mind. “It’s okay if you never get over it. But you have to let yourself move on.” 

“I just don’t get why I’m the only one who still cares so much.”

“You’re not.” He eyed her with trepidation. She squeezed again. “But it makes sense that it hits close to home for you. First your dad, then Bill. Both men you looked up to and loved, gone.”

They were quiet for the rest of the walk, both lost in thought. Bev dropped his hand when they passed Eddie’s front steps and continued walking.

“Bev?” Eddie nervously toyed with the straps of his backpack. She stopped and looked back. “Do you think we’re fucked up because of our fucked up relationships with our dads?”

“Probably.” She shrugged. “I think about my dad and I’m like fuck you, _fuckyoufuckyou_. But there’s still a part of me that—I don’t know, it’s not like I miss him. It’s just empty.”

“But you have your aunt. And I have you guys.”

“Yeah, but either your dad fucks you up because he’s not there, or your dad fucks you up because he’s there and honestly, nobody can live up to that shit.” 

She trilled her fingers at him and walked on. Eddie watched her until she disappeared around the corner, then he hopped up the steps and went inside.

*

It was 3:33 when Richie finally texted him.  
  
_> My dearest Edward,_  
_ > May I cometh picketh up mine carriage at thy humble abode?_  
_ > Hornily yours, Richard_  
  
Eddie’s eyes rolled up into his head. He mumbled to himself as he opened the texts to reply.  
  
“I can’t believe I’m going to fuck you.”  
  
_> You’re on thin fucking ice_  
_ > How soon can you be here?_  
  
Twenty minutes later, a knock at his bedroom window made Eddie jump and mess up the penmanship on his roommate request form. He looked up and saw the top half of Richie’s head watching him through the glass. With a huff, he walked to the window and opened it just wide enough for Richie to stick his face inside.  
  
“You rang?”  
  
“What the hell are you doing? My mom’s not even home, you could’ve come through the front door like a normal person.”  
  
“I was going for the nostalgia factor.” Eddie could hear Richie’s feet shuffling restlessly against the shingles under the windowsill. “Is this what it’s like to get dommed?”  
  
Eddie opened the window the rest of the way and stepped aside. Richie pulled himself through and flopped onto the floor, glasses askew and long denim-clad legs in a heap. He arranged himself into a sitting position on the floor and started to pull off his sneakers.

“So,” Eddie was suddenly drawing a blank on basic human interaction. He watched Richie’s long fingers tug at his shoelaces and his teeth tug at his bottom lip. “How was your day?”

He’d never been _nervous_ around Richie before. He’d never had a reason to _be_ nervous around Richie. All the newness of it—of knowing that his tongue tasted like mint and ash, how he sighed when Eddie ran his fingers through the hair at the back of his neck—was incredibly distracting.

Eddie unbuttoned his jeans and started shimmying out of the tight legs. Richie didn’t seem to notice. 

“Pretty good.” He tossed his sneakers aside and reached for the copy of _Giovanni’s Room_ he’d given Eddie for his eighteenth birthday that was sitting precariously on the ledge of Eddie’s desk. “Delaney was being a such a dick to Jen during Bio. You know, the girl who transferred from Indiana?”

“You mean the one you said you wanted to tittyfuck last week?” 

“Don’t tell me you’re already getting jeal—”

Richie looked up from where he was absently flipping through pages. Eddie was standing at the end of his bed, toying with the hem of his t-shirt. They locked eyes as Eddie pulled it up and over his head, letting it fall onto his discarded jeans. 

“I _seriously_ doubt I need to worry about it. She’s way out of your league.”

Richie scrambled to his feet, book tumbling to the floor. He possessively slid his hands over Eddie’s bare waist and onto the small of his back, pressing in close enough that Eddie could count the freckles scattered across the bridge of his nose. 

“I wasn’t listening to anything you just said.”

Eddie couldn’t tell who moved in first.

Their lips came together like synchronized swimmers doing a routine for the hundredth time, which was weird. Was it weird? It wasn’t really, which was making Eddie feel weirder.

Eddie gasped when Richie’s tongue laved across the roof of his mouth. Richie echoed the sound with a hum, his voice vibrating down to the tips of Eddie’s toes. He pushed Eddie onto the bed _hard_ and watched him fall back with a high-pitched sound caught in the back of his throat. 

Richie climbed over him, pressed their hips flush between Eddie’s legs. He ran his hands up the backs of Eddie’s thighs and Eddie wondered when freakishly large hands had become such a turn on. He shivered and sighed into Richie’s mouth, tracing his fingers up his spine and the nape of his neck. 

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this.”

“Do what, kiss me?”

“Well, yeah, that too.” Richie sat up, pulled off his ratty Anthrax tee and flung it over the side of the bed. “I was talking about this.”

He slid his hands back up Eddie’s thighs, blunt nails scraping over thin fabric until he was grabbing two handfuls of Eddie’s ass. Eddie felt his hips lift slightly before Richie was rocking into him, his dark head ducking down to suck bruises into Eddie’s throat.

“ _Fuck_.” Eddie breathed, eyes squeezed shut. He was already panting and grasping at Richie’s shoulders, but he had his _pride_ , dammit. “That’s it? I thought you wanted to fuck me.” 

Richie’s rhythm stuttered and Eddie felt teeth scraping deliciously along his collarbone. 

“Yeah?” Richie mumbled between bites. He wriggled his hands free and hiked Eddie’s thighs higher up his waist, hitting an angle that made Eddie gasp again. “Where’d you get that idea?”

“You saying you wanted to suck my dick, for one.”

“Fair.” Richie’s lips wandered up his neck before he pulled away. “Do you want me to?”

“Want you to what?” 

“Fuck you.”

Eddie felt everything from his neck up go scarlet. He was mad at himself for being embarrassed by Richie’s bluntness. And he was sort of mad at Richie for provoking him. And he was mad that Richie could still _make_ him so mad.

“Yes.”

His voice was so quiet that it was barely even a word. Richie watched him closely, his expression more intense than Eddie could ever remember seeing it.

“Are you sure?”

“ _Yes_.”

“Yes what?”

Eddie squirmed under him, impatiently trying to move things along, but Richie was enjoying himself now. His eyes were dark and his mouth was swollen and Eddie knew how to get this fucker to give him what he wanted.

“ _Rich_.” He squeezed his thighs tighter around Richie’s hips and tugged hard on the hair at the nape of his neck. “I want you to fuck me.” 

“ _Shit_. My dick has literally never been this hard.”

“Prove it.”

He did.

Twenty minutes later, they were laying side by side, chests damp and heaving. Richie’s jeans were half on and half off the bed, and his glasses were lost somewhere in the sheets.

“Sex is the _best_.” Richie threw both fists into the air in triumph. “You’re amazing.”

“Yeah.” Eddie sighed contentedly. “God, I feel so relaxed.” 

Richie propped himself up on his elbow and looked down at Eddie.

“Hey, would you wanna go grab some dinner tonight? Bev told me that new Thai place downtown is actually not terrible, considering this is Maine and I doubt anyone in this town could point out Thailand on a map.”

Richie blathered on, but his eyes traced Eddie’s face, and his fingers absently wandered over the skin of Eddie’s shoulder. Eddie felt a streak of panic run through him like electricity.

He pushed himself up and licked into Richie’s open mouth. He swung his leg over Richie’s bare hips and pushed him back into the bed.

“I was thinking we could just stay in.” He kitten-licked Richie’s stupidly perfect cupid’s bow. “All night.”

Richie quickly forgot all about Thai food, and quite possibly the existence of Thailand entirely. 

*

Thursday brought the first taste of summer to Derry.

Late afternoon warmth was clinging to everything, including the collar of Eddie’s weather-inappropriate button up—the only barrier between his ten thousand hickeys and the entire student body.

The bleachers echoed with the sound of cheers and conversation. They were almost completely full—practically the entire upper class of Derry High had turned out for varsity soccer in anticipation of the bonfire later that night.

Eddie barely noticed the noise. Richie was sitting on his right, tracing little patterns into his palm where it lay open on the bench between them. Eddie wanted to drag him behind the bleachers and stick his tongue down Richie’s disgusting throat. 

He’d been distracted all day. First, they’d been late to pick up Bev after their morning makeout session unintentionally escalated. Then, his plan to corner Richie at lunch was sabotaged by their advisor, who requested that Richie stop by her office after third period.

Eddie had _never_ acted like this in his _life_. And the worst part was that he sort of liked it. 

“Are you okay?” Eddie jumped and jerked his hand out from under Richie’s. On his left, Stan was watching him with narrowed eyes. “You’ve been holding your breath for like, a whole minute.” 

“Fine.” Eddie answered a little too fast to be convincing. “I’m just thinking about tonight. Trying to make sure I didn’t forget anything.”

“I’m sure it’s gonna be great.” Ben leaned out from behind Bev to Eddie’s right. “Relax, you’re supposed to be having fun.”

“You know Eddie.” Richie casually slurped his icee. “Always a tight-ass.” 

Eddie stared daggers up at him. His gaze flitted to Bev, who was watching them with an entirely too knowing look on her face.

“Speaking of tonight,” Mike chimed in from his spot beside Patty. “What’s the plan? Are you guys still getting a ride with me?”

“Yes.” Eddie confirmed vehemently. “And if I see a single one of you besides Mike with car keys tonight, you’re getting the full version of the drunk driving lecture I had to memorize for the student safety assembly.”

“I can’t go through that again.” Richie groaned around his straw. “It almost made me want to be responsible.” 

The second game ended just as the sun started to dip below the horizon, and the mass of students loudly made their way down the bleachers and across the field to the parking lot.

They all piled into Mike’s truck—Stan and Patty in the cabin with Mike, and the rest of them back in the bed—and followed the parade of cars to one of the larger lots on the edge of Eddie’s neighborhood. A dirt driveway took them past the main house and into the backyard, where a large converted barn was glowing with fairy lights.

By the time they parked, the bonfire was already lit and crackling loudly. They found a spot with ground-level benches and huddled together, falling into an easy rhythm of conversation that only exists between close friends.

Eddie sat quietly at the edge of the group, sharing the smallest bench with Richie. He felt a familiar hand brush along his forearm and looked up.

“Hey, Eds.” Richie’s voice was low, soft and comfortable. “You alright?”

“Yeah. It’s just, you know.” He shrugged. “I miss him.”

Richie didn’t say anything. He trailed the rough pads of his fingers down Eddie’s arm and tangled them with Eddie’s smaller ones. Eddie leaned his head against Richie’s shoulder.

“Rich?”

“Yeah?”

“Are we okay?”

Eddie pulled back and saw Richie’s face do something that he’d never seen it do before.  
  
“Yeah, we’re okay.” Richie’s eyes went to Eddie’s lips. For a second, he thought Richie was going to kiss him right there in front of everyone. “Listen, Eds. Earlier today I—”

Richie was cut off by a familiar voice calling Eddie’s name over the noisy crowd.

“Hey, Eddie!” 

Eddie looked over his shoulder and saw Holly, the tall blonde soccer girl, maneuvering her way over to them. He reluctantly moved to an empty spot next to Ben to make room. She sat down next to Richie, close enough that she was practically in his lap.

“I just wanted to say thanks for all your help, I heard we met our fundraising goal from concessions alone.” She reached into her back pocket and pulled out a Ziploc bag with what looked like Smarties inside. “Some of the team pooled our money and got these to celebrate. Do you guys want some? My treat, as a thank you gift.”

Richie looked up from his phone with raised eyebrows. Eddie exchanged glances with the others. They all shrugged, like they were sharing a single telekinetic thought: _Fuck it. Why not?_

“Um, yeah. Sure.” 

Holly leaned across Richie’s lap to shake some of the tablets into Eddie’s hand. He counted out six—one for each of them minus Mike—and put the extras back in the bag.

“Have fun!”

She slipped back in the direction of the barn, where the bass was steadily getting louder and louder. Eddie passed the tablets around and they all held them up like communion wafers. 

“Okay, before we do this,” Stan pointed a finger directly at Richie. “No pictures, no videos, etcetera that can be used as blackmail. I’m still doing damage control from when we took dabs over Thanksgiving break.”

There was an explosion of laughter as everyone started to recount the events of said incident, complete with reenactments. Eddie looked at the tablet between his fingers and noticed a tiny heart stamped into the center.

He popped it into his mouth and felt it start to dissolve on the tip of his tongue, heart and all. 

*

Everything was hot sweat and skin and the sound of the bass swallowing them on all sides.

Eddie’s brain was in overdrive. It was almost impossible to focus on one sensation at a time. He could feel his nails scraping along Richie’s scalp, Richie’s hands gripping his waist. He could taste salt on Richie’s collarbone as he leaned against him, throwing off their dancing.

He gasped when Richie’s hands wandered down over his ass and hoisted him up by the thighs. Eddie wrapped his legs around Richie’s waist and smiled down at him. Richie kissed his nose and leaned forward to yell into his ear.

“Let’s go get some water.”

Eddie giggled as Richie carried him across the dance floor and towards the kitchenette, his hands groping his ass more liberally than necessary and his glasses digging into the skin of Eddie’s neck. He vaguely wondered if they were being obvious. He figured he could always blame the ecstasy if anyone got weird about it.

Richie set him down gently, his hands slipping to hold Eddie’s hips as he found his balance. Eddie gripped the metal counter and watched Richie reach for the Brita pitcher that was sitting next to a stack of red Solo cups. He poured it directly into his mouth. Water dripped from the corners and down the lines his neck that Eddie liked so much.

Richie swallowed and wiped his mouth with his sleeve.

“Alright, Ginger Rogers. It’s your turn. Open up.” 

Eddie crossed his arms and shook his head. 

“You just put your mouth all over it. That’s disgusting.” 

“More disgusting than when I nutted down your throat last night?”

Eddie groaned.

“I hate you.”

“Love you, too. Now open up.” 

Eddie let his jaw fall open as Richie tilted the pitcher and poured. He had to admit, this shit was really fucking refreshing. Richie pulled back and set the pitcher back on the counter.

“Eds, I have to tell you something.”

“You’re gay.” He reached up and tangled his fingers in Richie’s hair, trying to pull him down into a kiss. “Knew it.”

Richie laughed and dragged Eddie’s wrists down until his hands were resting on his shoulders.

“There’s sort of this pre-frosh orientation thing at UCLA this weekend.”

“Yeah, but it’s prom.” Eddie said dismissively. He leaned in again, standing on the tips of his toes, trying to reach Richie’s lips. “Fuck that.”

Richie pulled back again and Eddie looked up at him with confusion. 

“I think I’m gonna go.”

“Yeah, right, you’re just gonna fly to LA for the weekend.” Eddie’s laugh caught in his throat when Richie shrugged. “Wait, you’re serious? Rich, listen to me. You are _getting_ into NYU.”

“But that’s the thing, Eds. I don’t even know if that’s what I want to do. Plus, I don’t know, maybe,” He ran a hand through his hair and shrugged again. “Maybe this would be a good thing for us. To have some space.”

The sound of something shattering behind him made Eddie jump. He looked around. Bev and Stan were absently knocking empty beer bottles off the counter as they attempted to enter the kitchen. Bev looked up with a hazy smile.

“Stan’s giving me a piggyback ride.” 

Eddie could hear Richie laughing into his hand. Bev flashed them a thumbs up. Stan seemed to give up on navigating the kitchen and started backing out the same way he’d come.

Richie pulled Eddie into his chest and wrapped his long arms around his head. He gave a little squeeze.

“Listen, this was stupid. I don’t want this to ruin our trip. We can talk about it tomorrow when we’re not completely fucked up, cool?”

Richie pulled back, kissed him on the forehead, and took off calling for Stan and Bev to wait up. Eddie stood motionless in the kitchen. He could feel cool air hitting the spot where Richie had kissed his face.

He couldn’t fucking breathe. 

He bolted into the bathroom, slammed the door shut behind him and locked it. He leaned back against it, head tilted back, and put two fingers to his pulse point.

“You’re _fine_. You know it’s not a logical reaction. In for one, two, three…”

He continued counting in his head as he breathed. He couldn’t even rememberthe last time he’d had one of his psychosomatic asthma attacks. After a few seconds, he moved to grip the counter and stared at himself in the mirror.

“He’s beyond this now.” Eddie was aware that he was talking out loud to his own reflection, but he needed to talk to someone rational, even if the only person available to talk to was himself. “He is beyond high school. He is beyond prom. He is beyond _you_.”

He blinked at himself in terror. 

“ _No_. You have to tell him how you _feel_. But how do I feel? God. FUCK—” 

“That was beautiful, man.”

Eddie whirled around so fast he nearly lost his balance and cracked his head against the toilet. There was a total stranger sitting in the bathtub, looking a little maudlin and lot drunk.

“ _Shit_. You really fucking scared me.” He paused to take another deep breath. “Are you okay?”

“Fine. Just, you know. Bad trip.”

“Oh.” Eddie felt the room start to spin. He sat down on the edge of the tub. “Me too.” 

He laid back against the folded up shower door behind him and closed his eyes. Time was moving at a pace he was unfamiliar with—his thoughts were racing, but he felt like he’d been thinking them for hours. He wanted to slap Richie in the jugular. He wanted to fuck him in the back of Mike’s truck. 

He wanted Bill to be alive again.

“Hey, dude.” Eddie snapped his eyes open. The guy in the bathtub was holding him up in a manner that suggested he’d almost fallen face first into his lap. “I think you passed out.”

“How long have I been sitting here?” He felt around for his phone before remembering he’d left it in the pocket of his hoodie in the other room. “Jesus. Okay, I have to go. Thanks for—I honestly don’t know. Just thanks.”

The main room was still packed with bodies. He stood on tip toes, trying to see where Richie, Stan and Bev had gotten to. He spotted a group of girls gathered by the back door, his hoodie was lying on the floor beside them. 

He waved tentatively as he approached them.

“Hey, have you guys seen Richie Tozier or Bev Marsh anywhere?

“Oh, yeah, I just saw them leave a second ago.” 

“Leave? Like, _leave_ leave?”

“It looked like it.”

“Are you shitting me? Not you, just. Thanks.”

Eddie snatched his phone out of his hoodie and scrolled through the mass of missed calls and texts as he hurried outside and ran past the bonfire and down the driveway. Mike’s truck was already gone.

He just stood there for a minute. Everything was so loud. His insides were going in so many directions it felt like his body was trying to tear itself up, but he was too tired and sad and angry to do anything about it at the moment. 

Or maybe ever.

*

The next morning, they were waiting for him outside the west entrance.  
  
Eddie exhaled and hugged his stack of catering forms tight to his chest. He attempted to blend in with the other students and walk past them without being seen, but Bev yanked on his sleeve and pulled him from the crowd and into their circle.  
  
“Hey, where were you last night? We looked everywhere and couldn’t find you. We thought you’d already left until we saw your messages this morning.”  
  
“It was fucked up of you guys to leave me there.” Bev’s face fell. Eddie turned to Richie and waved a hand between them. “All this trying to get it in with me before prom? It makes sense now.”  
  
Richie winced.  
  
“Eds, I swear it isn’t like that.”  
  
Eddie ignored him and turned back to the group.  
  
“Richie’s not going to prom. He’s going to orientation at UCLA. In _Los Angeles_.”  
  
“I think everyone knows that UCLA is in Los Angeles.”  
  
Eddie glared at Stan. He stood with his arms crossed, waiting for some kind of reaction. Nothing came.  
  
“Wait, you guys knew?”  
  
Richie tried to put a hand on Eddie’s shoulder but he swatted it away.  
  
“I hadn’t heard back from UCLA, so I didn’t know about it until yesterday. That’s why I didn’t tell you sooner.”  
  
“What about NYU? Did you get in?”  
  
Richie’s mouth did an uncomfortable twist, like he was physically pained by the words he was about to say.  
  
“I never got waitlisted at NYU.” Eddie felt white heat burst in the pit of his stomach. “I just wasn’t sure that’s what I wanted to do, and I didn’t need you to be on my case about it all year.”  
  
“So four days ago when you said that UCLA was your _safety school_ , that was just bullshit.” Eddie was practically shaking now. “And last night when you said we might need some space, what you really meant was _I’m going thousands of miles away to find someone else so tough luck Eddie, looks like you’re gonna be alone forever_.”  
  
“Don’t be so fucking dramatic.”  
  
Eddie stared hard at Richie and pursed his lips.  
  
“All I’m saying is I can’t believe you’d want to replace us with people who didn’t even know Bill.”  
  
There was an explosive moment of silence before Richie replied.  
  
“Are you fucking serious? I can’t be with anyone who didn’t know my dead best friend? Jesus, Eddie, he didn’t die so we’d all be stuck here forever.”  
  
Bev waved a gentle hand between them like a last ditch effort at a truce.  
  
“Guys, nothing is going to happen to us. Wherever we end up, we’re all gonna be fine.”  
  
“No.” Eddie shook his head. “No, _he’s_ fucking it up.”  
  
“Don’t you think you might be feeling a little scared, Eddie?” He turned to Bev. She looked like she was handling a very poisonous snake. “Because there’s another man in your life that might not always be around?”  
  
“FUCK!” Eddie threw up his hands in exasperation. “This is not a great time for the Freudian growing up without a dad talk, Beverly.”  
  
Richie was still staring at him, mouth hanging open in total incomprehension. Eddie launched forward and knocked into him as he sped towards the door and into the hall. He could hear Richie calling after him and tried to walk faster. He was just about to turn the corner when a large hand grabbed his wrist and dragged him backwards into the nearest empty classroom.  
  
Richie slammed the door shut behind them and faced Eddie.  
  
“What the fuck is wrong with you?”  
  
“I can’t believe you don’t want to go to New York with me.” Eddie’s voice was deadly quiet. “And I can’t believe you lied to me about it for this long.”  
  
“How long is that, exactly? You mean since Bill died and I suddenly became your Plan B?”  
  
“What is that supposed to mean?”  
  
“I don’t think you ever _once_ asked me what I wanted to do after high school until last summer. And now everything I do has to fit into your pathetic fantasy world where nothing bad will ever happen and I’m some kind of platonic replacement for him.”  
  
“ _Platonic replacement_?” Eddie balled his shaking hands into fists. “You’re the one who wanted me to fuck you just so you could go off and leave me on the opposite side of the goddamn country!”  
  
Richie laughed humorlessly and tugged at the straps on his backpack.  
  
“I can’t fucking believe this psycho girlfriend act. Bill might actually be lucky he died.”  
  
“How can you talk about him like that?” Eddie’s voice sounded like a piece of china crashing to the floor. “He was practically your brother. I don’t get it, this act you’ve been putting on all year, like you never gave a shit about him.”  
  
“You’re right, Eds. I’m not good at dealing with stuff. I never have been. But at least I know he’s gone.” Eddie blinked a row of angry tears back from his lash line. “You know what the worst part is? I felt so guilty after the accident because all I could think was maybe I _finally_ had a shot. I waited an entire year to try to tell you that, but I guess it’s just never gonna happen.”  
  
Eddie froze. Richie was looking at him so intensely that he couldn’t move, couldn’t _think_. He opened his mouth to say something—anything—but nothing came. Richie nodded with sarcastic finality and moved to open the door.  
  
“That’s what I thought.”

*

The rest of Friday felt like the longest day of Eddie’s life.

He’d been stuck at school until after 6:00, decorating the gym, setting up chairs and tables, making last minute calls about food and sound systems. He was bone tired, shuffling through his closet, pulling some of his favorite colored button-ups and slacks and laying them out on his neatly made bed. 

He glanced instinctively towards his phone where it was laying on his pillow. Nothing. 

He hadn’t seen or heard from Richie since that morning. He hadn’t turned up at lunch or any of his afternoon classes. Eddie had texted and called him at least a dozen times with no response. The only news he’d gotten was a text from Richie to the group chat—a screenshot of his flight itinerary from Bangor to LAX, flying out early Saturday morning and returning Sunday evening. 

Eddie sighed and went back to picking out shoes. His phone started ringing as soon as he turned away. He hurried over to grab it and tried not deflate when he saw Bev’s name requesting to FaceTime.

“Hey Bev.”

“Hey.” Her little face smiled up at him but she sounded much less Bev-like than Eddie was used to hearing her. “What are you up to?”

“Just picking out something to wear to prom.” 

“How’re you doing?”

“Depends on how much he told you.”

“Enough.”

“Then I’m doing terrible.”

“Yeah.” She didn’t sound very surprised. “Do you wanna talk about it?” 

“He hates me.” Eddie shrugged and propped Bev up on the comforter so he could grab another pair of shoes out of his closet. “Which makes sense, considering he’s been there for me for as long as I can remember, and I always assumed it was because he—I don’t know. And all I’ve done is think about myself and some other guy that’s been _dead_ for an entire year.”

“I don’t think that’s it.” Bev’s muffled voice sounded thoughtful. “I think this has way less to do with Bill than either of you think it does.” 

Eddie stood over his phone and looked down at her, shoes in hand.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re expiration dating.” The tiny Bev on the screen shrugged like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “You’ve spent practically every waking moment together since Bill died, so it’s not a surprise that you’ve got a complicated codependency with feelings. It isn’t just you—I don’t know if Richie ever actually liked you when he was younger. I think he just liked the idea of it. But now it’s like, everything is finally ending, and you’re both freaking out, trying to hold on when you know that things are gonna change whether you want them to or not, and now you have to figure out if he’s something you only needed for a while or if he’s something else.”

Eddie blinked silently at her, still holding a brogue in one hand. He slowly set it down next to its match on the floor. 

“Maybe.”

“And for what it’s worth,” Bev took a sip of something unidentifiable. “He doesn’t hate you.” 

“Thanks.” Eddie gave a little smile. He grabbed the phone and held it up so Bev could see the two outfits he’d assembled. “Okay, which one?”

“Red.” She said decisively. “Definitely.” 

“Red.” Eddie repeated it back to her. “That’s Richie’s favorite, too.”

She smiled.

“I know.”

*

Less than twenty-four hours later, the night had finally arrived.

Mike picked them up one by one. He and Sarah were up front, and the rest of them were drinking cans of cream soda in the back. Eddie tilted his head back against the metal bed and closed his eyes, feeling the cool air blow across his face. They must’ve made quite a sight—seven kids plummeting into adulthood, dressed up in their Sunday best, hitching a ride in the back of a beat up truck.

When they finally walked into gymnasium, Bev gasped. The walls were covered in sparkling sequin backdrops, a hundred paper lanterns hung from the ceiling, and all the chairs were tied up with tulle bows at simple white tables. 

“Eddie!” She grabbed his hand and pulled him into a hug. “It’s _amazing_.” 

They ran across the room quite improperly to claim one of the better tables before anyone else could get to it, and barely left their seats the whole night. Eventually, Bev succeeded in coercing everyone into dancing, and even though it felt totally middle school, no one could say the Cha Cha Slide wasn’t at least a little fun.

People started to pair off, scattered across the gym for photos and drinks. Eddie slipped out the gym’s back door into the chilly night. He wandered slowly around the back of the building and through the courtyard to Bill’s memorial bench. He laid across it and looked up at the inky black sky. 

He’d tried to pinpoint when he’d started putting so much effort into distracting himself. And from what exactly? From the fact that Bill was gone? That anything could end at any time and he couldn’t control it? He wasn’t entirely sure. Maybe deep down he was just afraid that he’d never find another person who made his chest feel like it was inflated with helium. Someone who made him feel safe.

He didn’t just have one. He had five. 

Headlights flashed across the courtyard as a familiar car pulled into the student parking lot. Eddie sat up and held his breath as Richie’s curly head of hair emerged from the driver’s seat. He was underdressed as usual, in a pair of faded black jeans and a white t-shirt that looked like it had been plucked off the top of the dirty laundry.

“Hey.”

“You came back.” 

“Actually, I never left.” Richie closed the car door and walked towards him. “I talked to the orientation coordinator. She said I can come another weekend. Then I called the airline and got my flight moved.”

“So, you were just giving me the silent treatment for the dramatic effect.”

Richie grinned.

“You know me, gotta maintain my mystique.” He sat down next to Eddie and their thighs brushed together. “I had some thinking to do.”

“What about?”

“You.” Eddie’s heart did a flip in his chest. “I think I’m in love with you. Like, for real.”

“Really?”  
  
“Yeah.” 

“Oh.” 

“Which like, really fucking complicates things.” He started gesturing wildly with his hands, something Eddie knew he only did when he was nervous. “I know how you felt about Bill, and I want to be mad about it, but I can’t stay mad at you ever. So, I’ve just spent this whole year being mad at Bill, for dying I guess. Maybe it’s easier to be mad at someone for dying than thinking about how you’re never gonna see them again. Anyways, now that we’ve, you know.”

“Fucked.”

“Yeah. I thought I could just get it all out of my system, and then I’d go to LA and you’d go to New York, and we’d talk on the phone every now and then, and see each other when we’re home for holidays, but that’s not what I want.” He stopped for breath and licked his lips. “And I know it’s one sided and you don’t want things between us to change, so I had to decide whether or not I could live with that.”

“And?”

“Well,” He shrugged. “About thirty minutes ago, I realized that if it’s a choice between having you as my friend or not having you at all, it’s not much of a choice.”

Eddie climbed onto Richie’s lap, one knee on either side of his hips, and sat back on his thighs.

“It’s not one sided.”

“It’s not?”

Eddie shook his head.

“I’ve been acting like a Stepford wife control freak this whole year.” He guided Richie’s hands up to his hips. “I’m sorry for trying to crowbar you into my bullshit.” 

Eddie leaned in to kiss him and Richie jerked his head back.

“But what about like, Bill and everything? And college and like, me fucking up basically everything you had planned?”

Eddie ran his fingers through Richie’s hair, rested his palms on his jaw, and dipped down to catch Richie’s lips between his own.

“It can wait.”

There was a sudden eruption of cat calls and indistinct yelling from the other side of the courtyard. They looked around and saw their entire herd of friends hurrying towards them. 

“What are _you_ doing here?”

Bev ran up and poked Richie violently in the chest. Eddie panicked and bolted off Richie’s lap with a stutter.

“Richie didn’t go to LA.” 

“No shit.” Stan deadpanned from behind Patty. “At least you idiots finally got this over with. Only took you all year.” 

Mike walked past them backwards and towards the parking lot, keys dangling in his hand. 

“You guys wanna take off?”

They waved, sending back soft goodbyes as they headed across the parking lot and hopped into Mike’s truck. Richie and Eddie watched them drive away. Richie stood up and laced their fingers together.

“Can I _please_ take you home now.” Eddie smiled up at him as he very theatrically yelled into the night sky. “It’s been forty-eight hours and I will  _die_ if I don’t suck your dick.”

Eddie laughed and tugged Richie forward by the hand, kissing him up against the car as he tried to unlock it.

“Take me home, dumbass.”

*

Almost exactly one week later, Eddie was back in Richie’s lap, kissing him so violently the he was actually worried it might be medically possible for their mouths to fall off.

“You two are literally unbearable to be around.”

Stan’s voice made them jump apart. They looked up from where they’d been hiding in an armchair in the corner of Richie’s living room. Their graduation party was still in full swing, but everyone was supposed to be in the backyard, minding their own business.

“If you want a private show, we accept Visa and MasterCard.”

Eddie shoved Richie further into the armchair. Stan, Bev, Ben and Mike crowded around them and sat on the carpet.

“I’m so bored.” Bev tugged at the carpet threads. “We’ve been here for like, five hours.”  
  
“Yeah, but we have to be here.” Ben leaned into her shoulder. “It’s our party.”

“It’s our _parents_ ’ party, so they can congratulate themselves on ejaculating us into the world.” Richie jiggled his knees so Eddie jostled around and almost fell through his thighs. “We’re only here for the checks and the food.”

“You’re foul.” 

“I’m a realist, Stanley.”

“Can we please focus?” Bev pulled out her phone. “We could go see a movie? The last showing of Infinity War starts at ten.”

“I’m in.” Eddie hopped off Richie’s lap. “The MCU is like one giant supercut of Titanic, Transformers and Men in Black. Can’t look away.”

“I swear I’ve never understood the plot of a single Marvel movie.” Stan pushed himself to his feet. “Patty hates them. I’m gonna text her the show time.”

They all pulled on their shoes and filed out the front door, walking the familiar route towards Derry’s downtown. Eddie and Richie hung back, hand in hand.

“Did you remember to send in your acceptance decision?”

“Yep. Signed, sealed and delivered, baby.”

“I’m proud of you.”

“Thanks, babe.” Richie beamed down at him. “But don’t think I didn’t notice your little switcheroo earlier today.”

“When your future employer googles you and doesn’t find a YouTube video of you saying _rise and grind class of 2018, let’s eat college’s ass_ in your graduation speech, you’ll thank me.” 

Richie’s eyes went mischievous just before he seized Eddie by the waist and threw him over his shoulder.

“What the fuck, Richard. Put me down.”

“Sorry, baby, no can do.” He started running forward to catch up with the rest of the group. “Your little legs will not stop me from seeing this absolute _cataclysm_ of a film as soon as humanly possible.”

Things made no sense at all, but in that moment, Eddie couldn’t have cared less.

**Author's Note:**

>   
> [*I LOVE YOU LIKE THAT BY DAGNY PLAYS OVER THE END CREDITS*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gT6k8VhDeA)  
>   
>  HAPPY BIRTHDAY KIERA! you are the bev to my richie. the andie to my duckie. the lily to my bex. i love you so much and i hope this little story makes you smile <3  
> 


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